this blue dance.

why the sharp burn as
i swallow the truth
for this fractured reality is
still what i would choose
you're exactly as i left you
using riddles to confuse
so why am i feeling the blues?

because hope finds a perch on
the branch of your soul, because
happiness grows from your
fist of control, because
you sail away on
golden ships that you stole, and yet
i am left feeling the blues.

your promises gone like the
smoke you exhaled
your kindness undone with the
damage assailed
the monster revealed and the
nightmare unveiled
and some days i still feel the blues.

i hate you for breaking me
breaking me down
i hate you for taking me
taking me down
i hate you for making me
fight just like you
i hate you for loving me with
anger and abuse
i hate you for saying this
was all my fault
i hate you for praying that
God would change my heart
i hate you for saying you
could do better than me
that my children deserved a
better mother than me

i hate you for words screamed and
words whispered and
words accused
i hate you for all the
silent weapons you used
and for leaving me with blacks and blues.

i will not stay broken, though
i cannot say how
i will not stay angry
i will not allow you to
hurt me and harm me
and hold my heart down
i will not always feel these blues.
​
someday the truth shall
awaken from sleep, and
justice will rise from
her merciful knees
until then i shall dance with this
freedom and peace
to the tune of my lonely-heart blues.
​